don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize