Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
only if we run a train.
done.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
that may or may not have been my penis.
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