I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
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i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize