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her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You made out with two different species that night
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Randomize
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