I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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