1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
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She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
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He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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