Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
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He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
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we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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