I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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