my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize