we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize