Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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