She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
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If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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