Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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