ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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