Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize