Sry I called you an 8
So drunk its hurt
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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