I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
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And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
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No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
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