People with herpes should wear stickers.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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