Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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