oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize