Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Come on in and take your pants off
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