I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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