sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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