hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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