Texts From Last Night

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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  So drunk i had to piss sitting down...

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  (803): So drunk i had to piss sitting down... http://tfl.nu/050t
  Replies (7) Good night (930) Bad night (380) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!

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  (405): I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh! http://tfl.nu/nhcn
  Replies (43) Good night (4945) Bad night (808) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.

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  (623): everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls. http://tfl.nu/6oxa
  Replies (37) Good night (5394) Bad night (1279) Order T-Shirt
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name

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  (571): I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name http://tfl.nu/x94s
  Replies (24) Good night (6104) Bad night (897) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life

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  (901): i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life http://tfl.nu/drtj
  Replies (6) Good night (6128) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos

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  (617): the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos http://tfl.nu/3hab
  Replies (11) Good night (3599) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.

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  (425): I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely. http://tfl.nu/v43n
  Replies (4) Good night (2767) Bad night (1615) Order T-Shirt
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing

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  (540): i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing http://tfl.nu/o77s
  Replies (18) Good night (2531) Bad night (1396) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.

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  (732): I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn. http://tfl.nu/68i4
  Replies (3) Good night (2471) Bad night (643) Order T-Shirt
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry

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  (229): No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry http://tfl.nu/1p4e
  Replies (6) Good night (2415) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.

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  (530): Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it. http://tfl.nu/z6l9
  Replies (5) Good night (2072) Bad night (636) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.

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  (616): youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for. http://tfl.nu/hm3o
  Replies (7) Good night (920) Bad night (430) Order T-Shirt
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.

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  (832): He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby. http://tfl.nu/1j27
  Replies (8) Good night (646) Bad night (550) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.

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  (916): Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though. http://tfl.nu/db3p
  Replies (15) Good night (268) Bad night (1385) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass

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  (775): You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass http://tfl.nu/qd0r
  Replies (5) Good night (505) Bad night (261) Order T-Shirt

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