He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just found a bag of teeth...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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