I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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