I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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