summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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