beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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