I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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