I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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