I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
birth control should be required to get into college
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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