Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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