Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize