I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
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I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
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