you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
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Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
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Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Just high enough for therapy.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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