My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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