There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
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I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize