I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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