HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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