Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize