Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
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