i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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