But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
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please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
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First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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