Hey man sorry I got all grabby
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize