i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize