good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
In America we eat man semen.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize