i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
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No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
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Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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