2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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